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We’ve all heard those nightmare stories from our friends about those couples who went and the therapist only made it worse.
The reality is that going to couples therapy does bring up unresolved issues. It does sometimes mean that things get worse before they get better. That’s why finding a trained couples therapist is so important.
Read moreWhen all you ever seem to do is fight with your partner it’s hard to want to go home and spend time with them. Finding extra things to do at work, or going out for happy hour with your friends seems like a reasonable excuse to avoid what has become a very tiresome pattern in your relationship.
Read moreYou and your partner have a pattern, it may look like this: You are feeling restless, you think it’s because of your relationship. You start to wonder what is wrong in your relationship. You question if your partner is cheating on you, if they’ve fallen out of love with you, if they are no longer interested in you sexually. You start to question if you’ve gained weight, if you are boring.
Read moreA client recently asked me “is it ever OK to talk to someone about their weight?”. We had been discussing her feelings around her body and the messages that she received as a kid growing up. This client was in the process of trying to understand how her parents apparent concern for her health had set her up for a lifetime of believing that her body was wrong. If she couldn’t receive this message from her parents, could she receive it from anyone else?
Read moreWhat happens when you go to the doctor for depression medication?
Each doctor is going to have a different protocol but in general you doctor will ask you about your symptoms to assess how much you are struggling with depression.
Read moreLet me start this blog by saying all feelings are normal. All of them. Sadness, anger, frustration, fear, anxiety, happiness, joy...all normal. For this reason, to some extent depression is normal too. Short periods of depression for say a couple of hours, a day or two, even sometimes up to a week is normal. Knowing the signs and symptoms of depression can help you decide when it is time to reach out for support from your doctor or a trained therapist.
Read moreOne of the most common issues that I work on with women in my therapy practice is helping them to understand the dis-satisfaction they have in their relationship. Often my clients will ask me what are the signs that they should leave their partner. There is no magic formula for making this decision and what I mostly end up telling them is to take their time, gather as much evidence as they can about the relationship and the state it is in, and be confident in their decision to stay or go.
Read moreIt felt really vulnerable and scary. You put yourself out there, risked being seen, and the worst case scenario happened. Maybe you tried for that job promotion, or you asked that cute guy at the coffee shop out. Whatever it was, you took a risk and are now left feel disappointed, self critical, and a little ashamed.
Read moreBefore you can address an uncomfortable feeling you need to first be able to label the feeling that you are having. Our bodies and our brains communicate our feelings to us in many ways.
Read moreYou may have noticed throughout my blog and website that I refer to feelings as uncomfortable and comfortable. That’s because
Read moreEach couple brings in a unique set of challenges and experiences that dictate their needs in couples therapy. Your therapist can discuss with you what your needs are and can help you and your partner create goals for couples therapy. Along with those goals that you create with your therapist there are some benefits that just go along with doing couples therapy.
Read moreGreat question! Talking to a friend, sister, or partner sometimes is enough. But sometimes it just doesn’t cut it. When things are really challenging and the struggle has been going on for a long time, leaning on friends and
Read more“I can’t remember the last time I just sat outside and enjoyed the sun on my face”. I can’t help but wonder, why is it so hard for us, as women, to take care of ourselves. Not only is it hard for us, we feel like we have to justify it when we do with statements like “I didn’t have
Read moreEven the best of couples can feel off in their relationship after a baby arrives. Exhaustion has set in, routines have changed, and you are in the midst of renegotiating household responsibilities. As the kids get older it can continue to feel as if you and your partner are no longer spending time
Read moreThis week I thought we’d focus on morning routines. Morning routines can look a little less sexy than evening routines. Having kids often means we wake up and are in go mode until the kids get to school. Finding shoes, finishing homework, making sure everyone has their lunch, ate breakfast, and is clear on
Read moreAny woman who has ever been a mom knows intimately that deep guilt that creeps in every once in awhile. Mom guilt, that sneaky asshole can hit at any time for any reason. When at work we can be overcome with guilt for not being at home, when at home we feel guilt for thinking about work, when we are with our partners we feel selfish for being away from the kids. A lot of times the things we feel most guilty for are the things we most need, the things that make us whole, functioning, normal, human beings.
Read moreGive yourself permission to do one thing to take care of yourself this weekend.
Read moreYour attachment style and your partner’s attachment style can have a big impact on the way the two of you connect. For example when in a fight the avoidant person may withdraw emotionally from the argument while the anxious
Read moreAffirmations are a great way to disrupt an uncontrollable thought pattern or to disrupt a thought that is on a loop. Affirmations can also help you start to rewire the brain so that you experience more calm throughout your day. Once the brain recognizes the affirmation
Read moreWhen you’re in the middle of anxiety it can be hard to know what to do to help yourself gain control and to calm the anxiety. Here are 3 quick strategies to try that may help you when you are feeling anxious.
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